Trapped Awake

Know what it’s like to be trapped awake?

For days on end, hallucinate.

An immense strain upon the body

No falling asleep instead passing out

So damned exhausted one can’t count

Thoughts so jumbled as one mumbles

Can’t make sense of one’s own mind

Speaking to oneself, in search of a sign

Paranoid by now, covering all tracks

Forgetting by this time that sleep one so lacks

Bipolar Developed or Genetically Earned?

Written by:  Skye Lochlan

Image Added: Randy Sturridge

She closed her eyes
Brought her safety net into her mind
It went to a white void 
It permeated the heavens

Deep ache of cold and isolation
Did not come from the icy corpse of winter
Or any ravenous monster which lived
Only in fairy tales

The ache in the heart came from 
Broken pieces that danced 
The Dance of the Macrabe continuously
Day after day

With age her soul grew continuously restless
Shards of crushed crystals chafed inside
Hurt unseen 
Tears of blood filled her eyes

The wounds were covered with polite conversation
No medicine or fairy godmother laden 
With Fairy Dust would not magically put
Back the crushed pieces of her heart

At birth her soul was fashioned perfectly pure
As an untainted crystal
How did it break
Why did it break

She often surmised
It must be amazing and a great gift
To be cherished, nurtured
And tenderly cared for

She had been thrown away
She knew she was no good
Ravaged by time
The illness increased
Hope? She asks

Find More of Skye Lochlan's work at:  The Creative Soul

Drawing: Gaze

Look about the room,
Canvas all the corners
Catch a gazing stare
Look away moving on


                   Look about the room
                   Full of silent watching
                   Facing forward all but one
                   Look that way just for fun
     
                                         
                                         He is staring still he stares     
                                         Why's he facing backwards                     
                                          A slow spreading smile
                                          Contorts his long wry face

                                                             
                                                            Open mouth empty eyes
                                                             Blanket, alone, in pain
                                                             He settles back in his seat
                                                             Facing forward, conforming                    

The strange things that happen. That we will never know why...

Randy Sturridge

Lost My Mind

Today I lost my mind

Lost the ties that bind

Right, wrong, sing beside

Dance in and out of line

Scream at walls

Watch them fall

Reveal the voice

Heed the call

Scratch the wrap

On my bones

Who’s in the telephone?

Lights off

Look at my feet

Funny shapes

I don’t sleep

Come and play

For half a day

Search for walls

Where they call

We will win

New found friends

Start over

Play again

Right, wrong sing along

I lost my mind

Ill be fine

I’ll search the walls

When they call

I’ll be fine

I’ve lost my mind

Little Tree Gnomes

I know I’m likely to see the little gnomes that live in the frees

They have left their land again and they come to live here

They always ask me to play, often times occurring around midday

They are so kind…as they juggle their knives

The gnomes in the free’s, they tap on my window

I tell them that it’s late, but they continue to stay

T don’t want to play, not tomorrow, not today

I would like for them to just go back to their trees

They only bother me when they throw thoughts from the frees

I’ve already tried to give them what they want

I have found that they are liars and they constantly  pry

Always asking questions and giving me directions

I don’t want to juggle knives but they keep on insisting

They tell me theirs a reason, but to say would be treason

Fine, little gnome, you persistent little drone,

I’ll give you what you want if you’ll just leave me alone

I learn to juggle knives…Its actually kind of fun…

Finally they tell me…I’ve been chosen for a mission

First, I must promise to keep them a secret

or It would endanger my family…

They tell me of the mission, I strain so hard to listen

When they are finished I couldn’t believe all of the bad bad

Things they could see

I agree to help and to keep them a secret

I am so lucky to be chosen by the secret tree gnomes

My mission is classified I let them move indoors

They are my companions…at night they guard the doors

My family can’t see but I understand…

I can’t tell them anyways…

It would ruin the plan.

I train in the night when all are sleeping.

The tree gnomes tell me that sleeping is for the weak

During the day I sleep if I can..

Woken by mother who just doesn’t understand

Mom and Dad tell me I’m getting worse.

I see it in their eyes…I’m a burdensome curse

I can’t work because of the voices…

I’ve done some things, made some bad choices

But now it’s okay because of the gnomes

My family will see once the plan is complete

They will be so proud…

I would tell them now but it would put them in danger

The gnomes reassure me that it will all be better soon

Tonight is the night my mission is soon

I have all the items and I’m locked in my room

Thank you kind gnomes for all of your help

The moment is now…

I am ready to travel

I have the knives around my waste and I’m in position

I know how to travel because I’ve really listened

The tree gnomes are smiling, it’s time to travel.

They are chanting my name as I climb on the dresser

I will see my family when I return

They will be so proud, I’m a warrior they’ll learn

I wave goodbye to MY EMPTY ROOM

Jump off the dresser, the noose tightens so soon

I CAN’T  BREATH, I CAN’T BREATH

WHY DIDN’’T I TRAVEL?

CHOKING I SEE ALL THE GNOMES

LAUGHING…CACKLING

I don’t understand why are they laughing, I’m Dying

I’m Dying, and they are just Laughing

My Parents break in but it was to late

My dead body dangles with knives around my waste.

Pinned to my chest it says I’m a warrior

It says Ill be loved once I fix the gnome border

My parents cry…

I died all alone, there were no tree gnomes and I…

Am no warrior

I’m just a dead schizophrenic kid,

That wanted the love his parents couldn't give

I am dead with demons in my head

Mind Puddle Madness

Illustration: Dickie Gonzo

Mind Puddle Madness

It is early in the morning and I am awake

This day so it seems is mine to take

Thinking about time as it quickly passes by

I know what awaits; I just want to die

The darkness shifts slowly as I gaze at the sky

Why does this happen oh Lord I cry

The light in the car hurts my eyes

I'm just a product of Time's Demise

Bars on the windows and shelves without books

I turn from the mirror for it reveals my True looks

I sit on the floor and I began to rock

Wishing Time's madness would just fucking stop

Pulses of pain beat inside my brain

Thunder in my heart as my thoughts fall like rain

Black heavy shadows with hollowed out eyes

This world is nothing but pain and rich lies

Why won't they stop, these racing thoughts

Ravaging my mind as it thickens the plot

Waving goodbye as the Time passes by

Standing in the puddle from the thoughts my mind cries.

End